Greedy man. Why are men greedy?

“She only wants my money!” – men increasingly accuse women of having a consumerist attitude towards themselves and their loved ones. “Instead of pure love, give her a fur coat and a ring with diamonds” - such reasoning is increasingly found on various forums on the Internet. It all ends with a rhetorical “why?!”, and in the comments a lot of stories immediately appear on the topic “How money kills love.”

Meanwhile, if a man has a wallet, this absolutely does not mean that everything else is unimportant to women. Of course, it is generally common for us to choose a partner who can adequately provide for the family - according to anthropologists, this is embedded in our genetic memory. But as romantic natures, we still pay more attention to feelings. But men, no matter how much they insist that love should be selfless, increasingly reduce communication to calculations of who owes whom and how much. Don't believe me? The stories of our heroines are clear proof of this.

Tatyana, 28 years old:

“Once a young man courted me. During the New Year holidays, he invited me to a restaurant, had an appetizer for two and a couple of glasses of wine. The bill was not a million, but I, as a decent girl, offered to pay half. He not only refused, but was also offended, as if I had suggested something indecent. After that, we met with him four more times, went to the movies and concerts, always on his initiative. And then, he suddenly announced that then, on the first date, he had the last money, he spent it on me, and I, they say, don’t appreciate it! I didn't know whether to cry or laugh. He then asked for forgiveness, spoke, and burst out. But, in general, this is a verdict, of course.”

Svetlana, 26 years old:

“I had such a case. The young man actively courted me. In principle, I liked him, and I thought, well, why not, let’s try to communicate, and then life will show whether we are suitable for each other. First he invited me to an amusement park, then to a movie. And on the third date - to some fashionable, terribly pretentious restaurant. I’m not a fan of such an atmosphere and even told him that it’s not at all necessary to go to such a place, you can sit in a regular cafe. But he began to passionately convince me that such a luxurious girl should only be taken to decent places. We sat and drank a bottle of champagne, and suddenly he told me with such sadness that he had saved money for his business, and now he spent it all on me. And suddenly he started crying! I felt like I was in a Mexican TV series, I had to console him what to do. She offered to reimburse him for expenses, although he refused, but still somehow I didn’t want to meet with him anymore.”

Ilona, ​​30 years old:

“One day a man started courting me. At first I didn’t really want to go on a date with him, but he was so persistent that in the end I agreed to meet for a drink. He and I came to the cafe, I ordered a cappuccino. I don’t eat after six, so I gave up desserts. The next day he sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a basket of cakes to my office. A day later, he met me from work and offered me a ride home. We’re already approaching, and he says to me: “Let’s take your son to his mother today, and I’ll come visit you all night.” I was taken aback by such impudence, replied that, in fact, I was not expecting guests, and asked if he was rushing things too much. He calmly took out his phone, opened the calculator on it and began to count. And then he announced that in this case I owe him for coffee, flowers, cakes and - attention! - for the gasoline that he spent on the road from the office to my house! 2000 rubles."

Inna, 28 years old:

“A few years ago I lived with a guy, he lost his job. I reacted with understanding: well, it can happen to anyone. Time passed, but he never began to actively look for work. We lived on my earnings plus “humanitarian aid” from his mother. Eventually, I started wondering, “When are you going to start looking for a job?” To which he said to me with offense: “You are so mercantile, you only need my money!”

It’s good that I didn’t wait after that, I immediately left him. It is clear that with such an attitude it is impossible to create a family and raise children. Five years have passed, and he still gets by with small part-time jobs and sits on his mother’s neck.”

“One of my friends kept complaining about his ex-girlfriend, saying that she was with him only for the money. And it was funny to me, because at that time he earned, to put it mildly, a little, about two times less than his girlfriend. One day I couldn’t stand it and asked: “Do you think you have the kind of money for which a girl would date you without love?” So what do you think he answered? “Of course,” she says, “why else would she constantly want to go with me to the cinema or to a cafe?!”

Zhenya, 24 years old:

“I once met a young man on the Internet. He turned out to be very handsome and sweet, but I was still wary of online dating and therefore was in no hurry to go on a date with him. He, as they say, fell into the situation and invited me to the park for the first date. It seems like a crowded place. The meeting went well, we walked and chatted. He called me back that evening and the next day. Then he called me to the cinema. I delicately offered to pay for my ticket. To which he joyfully replied: “No need, I’ll buy the tickets, but in the meantime, buy popcorn, chips and don’t forget about it!”

Vera, 22 years old:

“I recently broke up with my boyfriend, and before that we lived together for two years, rented an apartment. We parted quietly and peacefully, as they say, friends. That is, I was sure that we were parting as friends, until he, in all seriousness, billed me... for everything. Believe it or not, he not only calculated how much each of us spent on renovations, furniture and household appliances over two years, but also took into account the cost of food and all the trips to cafes and cinemas. Since I always worked and spent on equal terms with him, the bill, I must say, was not mind-boggling. But I was amazed that he kept records and collected checks for two years. In general, the boy prepared for separation. I said that the accountant died in it, and did not take anything with me - let him enjoy it. I just feel sorry for his future girlfriend, of course.”

Olga, 29:

“I once talked with a former classmate. He lives in France now. He found me online and from the very first conversation he began to tell me how hard his life was. There is no work, my wife is divorced, I have to pay alimony. So he is looking for a soul mate, but all his classmates are so angry, they talk to him twice and add him to the black list. Well, it’s somehow inconvenient to send a person if he complains to you. Once I talked to him, another. Then he asked permission to call me, saying that you can’t write everything online, so he wanted to talk to me. I reluctantly gave my number. And he started calling me, pouring out his soul and a half each time, I didn’t even have time to get a word in. In general, after a month it became very difficult to communicate with him, there were no common themes, only moans and complaints on his part. Well, I began to increase the distance, he calls, and I come up with a reason to quickly end the conversation. The third time he realized this and wrote me an angry letter saying that I was, to put it mildly, a bad person: he spent so much money on calls from France to Russia, and I “dumped” him. All I could answer was: “Yes, communicating with women is a costly thing!”

Expensive is not the right word, especially if this is a serious relationship and not a couple of dates. So if a man invites you to treat yourself to a cocktail, let it be your first and last cocktail in his company.

Blogger Morena_morana shares her thoughts on sex, relationships, and love in her LiveJournal diary.

Her debut book is coming out soon - it will contain the very best.

Welcome to the world of hidden desires and violent passions!

I read women’s complaints about their husbands’ behavior while on maternity leave, and it just makes my hair stand on end. Does this really happen?

“He didn’t give money for pads, citing the fact that in ancient times women used to put moss on them, and it was necessary to stretch out the time of wearing pads, since constantly buying them would be a waste of money.”

“Food is purely for the child (curds, kefirs), diapers, clothes and toys (which he approves) are paid in half. We share food with the child (meat, cereals, vegetables, etc.) he calculates this way: from the receipt he calculates approximately how much my daughter ate, divides it in half... He doesn’t feed me. I have to dress like mine. In response to indignation that it is so wrong, families do not live like this, he replies: “You cannot know how families live behind closed doors. The entire civilized world lives with different wallets, and the child lives in half, and the husband and wife each provide for themselves.”

“My husband gives me money, but in a humiliating form for me - with a report with a bunch of questions: “Why, how much, why so much?” And he, the master, will still think about whether to give or not to give... He gives me 500 rubles, and even if I say what... I no longer know what to do. I sit with his child, and he thinks that he is a benefactor, throwing me money from his master’s shoulder.”

BARANOVSKAYA admitted... Photo: Instagram.com

“I have an eight-month-old daughter. My daughter and I went to my mother’s after my husband, when I was in the maternity hospital, sold my laptop and squandered all my maternity money.”

“I asked to buy shampoo with balm - she said: what is that balm for? Yesterday I said: buy me a toothbrush and sanitary pads. Again: you can do without gaskets. I’m sitting today, looking out the window, my dear one asks: what are you thinking about? I say this and that, thinking about where to find work from home, and he responds to me - you offend me. Are you missing something?

“I worked and didn’t hang on his neck. The third child was planned, we are not young and stupid. But with his birth, something went wrong with my husband. My husband doesn’t give me money, he says, go earn some money yourself. How to influence him?

Alarm bell

Of course, terrible things are described. And the most unpleasant thing is that it all started small - a separate budget, separate payment of bills in a restaurant. But it ends with one thing - the fact that you can’t get money for medicines and sanitary pads.

It seems to me that if during the period of courtship a man squeezes money on his beloved, then it will generally be “turn out the lights.” Women really don't like greedy men, and rightly so. Still, a separate bill is a wake-up call. This is not self-interest and commercialism, but ordinary intuition, so as not to beg for alms while on maternity leave. I'm right?

Girl for the restaurant

Here's the other side of the coin.

I opened dating ads and sat in shock. Almost every man is a married man. Moreover, most of them offer “loot” for meetings. “A lover with financial support is needed,” or “a married man needs a girlfriend for a trip to the sea,” or “a girl is needed for pleasant meetings. I'm done with restaurants and entertainment." In a word, they lure in whatever way they want. They don't skimp.

I might not have paid any attention to these advertisements if so many wives had not complained about the mind-boggling redneckness. Also with argumentation: they say, you are not a prostitute, why do I owe her a pad on maternity leave? Beggar!

And here they are ready to give their hard-earned money to some aunt on the side, not to their own wife, as if it were sweet money. They pay and don't buzz.

I wonder if these are the same men who are huddled at home to give money for food, clothes for their wives, sanitary pads, diapers, hair balm, are these the same men who promise mountains of gold to their mistresses, or are they different?

This was the custom in Soviet times

A matter of life and death

I remembered one incident from my life, a real one. In the company, a male doctor accidentally found out that he had allegedly been given 50 thousand for a successful operation. He, of course, boiled because he didn’t receive any money. I started to find out what was going on.

It turns out that they were talking about a married couple. Husband and wife, the same age, lived together for about 35 years, from their youth, when the man was suddenly diagnosed with a bad tumor. Moreover, no one gave any guarantees that the operation would be successful. They lived poorly and modestly. But the wife, without talking, allocated 50 thousand from the general savings, as if to “thank” the surgeon. I wanted the best. Well, then, of course, I told my friends about it - the amount was quite large.

And the man, as we found out when the company pinned him against the wall with the threat of exposure, took them... to a young student. He recovered and, having miraculously escaped death, decided to shake off his old ways. Naturally, having tasted the young body.

I’m thinking: “What if the operation had ended badly? Who would take care of the “vegetable”? Who would bury him? Is this a student? That's the same... You can't help but think about it.

When a young man says that all women are greedy and materialistic, you can be sure that such people have nothing to give a woman. And it’s not always just material support. Male energy must be directed at someone, just as female energy must be received. The energy of money is masculine energy, and a woman receives it through her partner. The ladies' contribution to the couple is of a completely different nature, but the companion has nothing to worry about - this contribution is also there, the relationship in the couple is always circular. First of all, you need to figure out how a greedy man differs from a stingy or practical man. Psychology has been researching this topic for a long time and what to do about this problem.

A rich companion may seem really greedy to a lady. The fact is that this type prefers to spend their money on their own business, especially if they have just started doing their own thing. I wouldn’t dare call my friend greedy; he still spends his money, purposefully, though not on a woman.

For a woman, there is a certain risk in these investments, albeit necessary ones - what if it happens that now her companion is investing, and her friend is putting up with it, but when the time comes to enjoy the honestly acquired fruits of her labors, will a new chosen one appear, who will get everything, without a protracted waiting period. For women, when understanding whether a friend is greedy or not, it is important to evaluate not how much money the partner spends on her, but what part of his income he spends or is ready to spend. The amounts may be different, their significance for the partner himself may be different.

What is money is an indicator of a partner’s success in life.

For representatives of the stronger sex, this is expressed in these pieces of paper. Having a certain income, a person is self-sufficient, successful and masculine energy is strong. Such partners also have certain disadvantages, which a lady who aspires to have a real alpha male nearby must understand and still be ready to go along with. He will not be able to devote much time and attention - after all, at this time he is earning money. Will not listen to emotions and hysterics and understand whims. Accept - yes, but will not understand.

If a man is greedy, it means that he either can’t give you what you need or doesn’t want to. That a man should be generous not only to provide for his wife, but also for himself. Knowing how to give money to his companion, he is able to give warmth, attention, love. Closing everything into yourself destroys the circle of warmth, care and love between yourself and your partner; this will never create a healthy relationship. And the woman asks the question: are you a man or not?

How to recognize a greedy man - certain signs that psychology kindly offers will help you with this.

• spends with pleasure only in cases where he receives direct benefits from spending. Dinner at an expensive restaurant is paid for only because it is his favorite restaurant. Any decoration will be purchased because you are going to a corporate party together, and you need to present your companion in a favorable light, without losing face in front of your business colleagues. Ultimately, these expenses are not for you;
• gifts are given only for occasion. Spending should be logical, practical and justified;
• Every time there is a conversation about finances, past achievements and extravagance in those days are remembered. This does not justify being frugal today, nor does it indicate how he intends to solve his difficulties;
• each item is accompanied by his comment regarding the price, with or without reason;

• knows everything about discounts better than you: where, what and when;
• large sums are spent with great reluctance;
• passion - collecting (apparently, including money);
• never leaves a tip in a restaurant;
• does not bring anything simply joyful into his life, without pronounced benefit. Having the means, he does not travel, is not interested in anything, has no passions (except for the mentioned collecting);
• carefully counts change;
• if you have just met, he does not try to treat you to a cup of coffee, and if this does happen, he offers to split the bill in half;
• if you live together, you require a report for every penny spent;
• the phrase “money doesn’t buy happiness” is a refrain in your relationships.

Some ladies also see stinginess in practicality, but if there is a rational explanation for this, which does not turn out to be a lack of attention and love for you, then this is rational spending. If the costs do not include the purchase of little things that bring joy to a companion, then the gift of emotions or attention will also be denied. Therefore, it is important to understand how to recognize and what to do next.

Reasons for Greed

Why men become like this and what influences it.

• A systematic lack of funds in the past, perhaps poverty in the parents’ family and in one’s own. People who have experienced hunger will never throw food away; it’s the same with finances - the fear of getting into the same situation.
• Birth trauma (for lovers of esotericism - karma). It is already recognized that the heritage of the family greatly affects the fate of each descendant. This also includes the model of behavior in the family: the father sharply limited the mother’s finances, reproached her for wastefulness, now your friend is repeating the laid down model.
• Life for the distant future. By accumulating finances for the future, which will not be any time soon, such people forget about the present, which already exists now.
• Doesn't believe in your relationship or feelings. This usually happens at the beginning of acquaintance, when prospects have not yet been determined and there is a risk. If the partner understands this reason, such a relationship may become even shorter - it is quite unattractive.
• Complexes and fears. There are people who will forever be afraid that their companion has feelings not for him, but for his condition, status, advantages of living together. If a person is confident in himself, he will not be afraid of it. But a person who does not have this, and is already afraid of losing it, will not want to share this (even if non-existent) benefit. Potentially not.
• As a child, his parents indulged their son’s selfishness. The last cake will never be yours, there is a habit that it is a favorite.
• The most easily solved reason is a misunderstanding of a woman’s hints. The easiest way to deal with this is to stop hinting and say your desire in plain text. Perhaps the satellite is not aware of this at all and is ready to instantly solve this problem. If the hint turns into a direct request, and the result is the same, it means that you are still unlucky and the diagnosis is fixed.

Is it possible to find out in advance that you are dating a greedy man? Even at the stage of romantic meetings, you can check the attitude of a potential spouse towards money. For example, walking past a flower shop and hinting at your partiality for flowers. Or pass the costume jewelry department and admire the jewelry (it’s still possible and inexpensive, this is a test mode). If the gift is not received immediately, do not make hasty conclusions that he is stingy. Didn’t hear, didn’t understand, didn’t have the required amount (you went for a walk in the park, not in the jewelry store). And only if time passes, tests are repeated, and your little dream lies in its place and does not warm your soul, is it worth thinking about. In addition, sometimes the chosen one’s appearance encourages this opinion: worn-out clothes, shiny elbows, one sweater for all meetings.

How can this be changed?

How can you correct a man's character if his partner is very greedy? What to do if a man is dear to you? There are some tips for this case.

The greedy man himself suffers from this. Psychology can alleviate the problem, but there are no effective ways to combat this quality. Either a person can cope on his own if the desire arises, or no one can put this intention into consciousness. This is to some extent a diagnosis, and on the verge of an actual disease - the inability to share. He will probably try in some of his own ways to show love for his life partner, but will this suit both sides?

And if you don’t change, how can you continue to live?

Your husband is stingy. Neither divorce nor fix it, you need to move on with your life. How should wives who find themselves married to such a person behave? You will have to use all female wisdom and patience and include a sense of humor. So, advice for wives.

• carefully and quietly manage his desires and intentions. Misers are characterized by a passionate desire to manage financial flows in the family. Let it be so, or rather let him think so. Who will remember who actually came up with this or that great idea? Of course, this is the husband’s idea - the main thing is to convince him of this with facts, arguments and undeniable evidence. Which amazingly save the family budget;
• the purchase of the desired item is carried out only after other, more expensive and less economical, models have been demonstrated. The “cheap” option will be found as if by chance, after the zeros flash before the eyes of the unfortunate person;
• a woman in such a situation should be at least somewhat financially independent and have her own budget, with pins. This will save your pride and allow you to at least sometimes enjoy an illegal chocolate bar or wear a blouse that “you bought a long time ago, you just forgot.”

A woman will have to constantly show remarkable ingenuity in order to live with a man who counts pennies. A successful couple will be in which both are tight-fisted, then there will be no discomfort in the relationship.

Legends are made up about greedy men, poems are written (and far from pretentious odes), such people become characters in poems and novels (remember the famous Plyushkin from the famous novel by N.V. Gogol). Psychologists write dissertations about greedy men. It is worth remembering that in case of a serious violation, the help of a specialist is required. This is worth doing if your partner has not previously noticed such behavior.

If you started dating a young man and realized that among his characteristic features there is also this, not the most pleasant, trait, all that remains is to determine for yourself whether it is worth continuing the relationship and where it will lead both of you in the end. Everyone's dream is a generous man.

There is nothing more offensive to a woman than to be confronted with male greed. Moreover, in this case, a woman often begins to think that there is something wrong with her, that “she somehow attracts greedy men into her life,” or, even worse, that she is “mercantile.” Let's try to figure out whether there is some truth in this, whether women's desire for male generosity is natural, why men are greedy, and, most importantly, how to recognize greed in time so as not to regret your choice for the rest of your life.

What does redneckness lead to in a relationship?

The woman begins to invest emotionally in the relationship, cooks, washes, cleans (if they live together), gives the thirsty charity sex for beautiful words (often she pays for a lot), and in return receives neither comfort, nor support, and often - no status . Not yet understanding what is happening, she begins to feel robbed and irritated, closes down, ceasing to experience both warm feelings and sexual desire for the miser. Accustomed to only receiving, the thirsty person suddenly discovers that the stream of energy and unconditional love for him is drying up - and begins to take offense and make claims. Having received nothing in return, a woman who has energetically invested herself in the relationship is suddenly faced with a terrible truth - on the “other side” there is a demanding, indifferent boy, and for some time she has been banging against a reinforced concrete wall, which is cold by nature. As we see, a man who is stingy with money is stingy in everything - in love, in attention, care and emotions. But, alas, he himself does not understand that he is robbing himself...

What a happy woman can give a man

They say that if a man is greedy in his relationship with his woman, his luck will turn away. Why is this happening? The fact is that women's creative energy is much stronger than men's, therefore women's ability to influence events is also high - both their own destiny and the man who is nearby. If a woman experiences happiness and pleasure in a relationship, her man begins to be lucky - in a satisfied positive state, she literally blesses him for good luck and attracts favorable opportunities. Either a beneficial flow or a destructive one rushes through a woman to a man.

Wise men spare no expense on gifts for their woman, strive to protect her from any unpleasant work and surround her with pleasant impressions. They feel that a satisfied woman is the source of his luck. Moreover, it does not matter how expensive the gifts he gives - it is important that the man does it from the heart and spends a significant amount for him. Even if he is not able to take his woman to a luxurious restaurant, he will buy her a bouquet of roses or a bucket of ice cream to bring joy. The woman feels his impulses, this opens a channel of exchange between them, and everything returns a hundredfold to the generous man. The redneck does not understand that in the relationship between a man and a woman there is an equal exchange, and if it is violated, the system fails.

Why do men become greedy?

Traumatized men do not understand the need for generosity towards their women, and the roots of these traumas can come from their childhood - for example, when the family saved every penny, or the boy’s father was not caring and generous towards his mother. It can also be programs of his kind - for example, when one of your gentleman’s ancestors died of starvation and, without even knowing about such a situation, the man lives in fear of not being in the same situation. Ungenerous men are the same boys at heart who need a caring “mom with big tits.” Complexes and self-doubt can also lead to greed, when it is important for a man to make sure that he is interesting “on his own” and not “because of money.” For this reason, such “self-seeking individuals” are afraid to make good money and block this opportunity for themselves. A man’s greed can also be caused by his distrust of women - such a man is afraid that these “mercantile predators” will spend his money (take away his energy) and leave him, and therefore wants to make sure that he is “interesting as a person” and not as a sponsor. Tough case, but let's see if you can do something about it.

What to do with a greedy man

Often at the beginning of a relationship, a woman can hear from a man a sob story about how his ex robbed him of everything. Girls, if she is not an out-and-out predator, and it all started out of love, think about what this “angel” did to her so much, what he had not given her for years, that during the divorce she considered it necessary to take away everything that was rightfully due to her. It is unlikely that you will be able to restore the “trust in women” of such a man with your “selfless love.” You are not a psychologist to spend your life understanding and treating his traumas. Also, if a man’s mother or father killed his desire to care for a woman, you cannot change this. It is unlikely that you will be able to restore self-esteem in an insecure man who wants to be loved “on his own.” On the contrary, you risk developing complexes - after all, if a woman feels energetic greed towards herself, her self-esteem drops due to the subconscious feeling “I am unworthy”, “they are saving on me” and, as a result, her feminine energy is blocked.

Very often, a girl or a woman at the beginning of a relationship strives with all her behavior to prove to a man that she is “not selfish” - she does not order too much, is afraid of offending him by asking to pamper her - and in vain! This is a real test of male generosity at the beginning of a relationship. Often a man asks: “You don’t love me because of money, do you?” Correct answer: “Because of the money too!” Of course, it is worth adding that monetary energy is an analogue of sexual energy, part of a man’s personality and his energy, proof that a man is in all respects Maybe. Any man will be flattered by such an answer, but there is no flattery in it - the pure truth. After all, you don’t need an energy impotent? Moreover, by showing at the beginning of a relationship that she does not need anything, a woman cheapens herself, lowers her worth and, thereby, sets the direction of the relationship. You have your own desires and needs - and you shouldn’t hide them or be ashamed.

How to recognize a greedy person

So, by what signs can you recognize a greedy person at the beginning of a relationship, so as not to allow yourself to be robbed later? You can judge a lot from the first date. The gentleman came without flowers and offers endless walks in the park and doesn’t even ask if you’re hungry enough to invite you to a cafe? Perhaps, everything is immediately clear here, and most women who value themselves will not give a second chance to such a lover of fresh air. If you are invited to a cafe or restaurant, pay attention to how a man behaves when ordering food - whether he laments how expensive everything has become, how he behaves when paying the waiter - whether he leaves a tip and does not count the change to the penny. If everything went smoothly in this regard, and you have only a positive impression, let’s move on to what the man is talking about.

Sometimes greedy men start talking about whether you could love a man who will work all his life in a low-paid job (for example, as a loader), but at the same time will be a good person. Here, perhaps, you have a reason not so much to be wary as to laugh - and what can you and such a “good man” talk about later - about a hernia? From the same series of fables about spiritual closeness and the importance of “loving each other for the soul.” Oddly enough, we live in a material world, and, despite all the desire, people cannot eat only the “fruits of love”. There is clearly an attempt to test your resources with the goal of using them later. Another thing you can pay attention to is that when money is mentioned, a man suddenly begins to “remember how he spent it before and how much he had.” This is already a more serious sign - the gentleman in the literal sense of the word may turn out to be a gigolo. If everything went well here, let’s move on to his actions.

A man comes to visit you empty-handed - girls, everything is clear here and without further explanation. Doesn’t he give you at least small gifts and suddenly buys himself an expensive item? A thirsty person from whom you should not expect either warmth or generosity of spirit. You notice that he is saving money by using your resources - here you are really being robbed, and continuing a relationship with such a man is not only unpleasant, but also costly. Many women may argue that if everyone is dispersed like this, there will be no one left, and that there are few men, and everyone is like that now. Not all. Sometimes you may be offered a choice of either raw potatoes or dried cucumber, but you want, say, pineapple. And, if you set such a goal, you will find exactly what you want. Even if it doesn't work out right away. In life, as in fairy tales, it happens that you have to kiss a bunch of toads before you meet the prince.

Nowadays, many women complain that men are greedy.

What is male greed? Does it always depend on a woman whether a man is stingy or not? Is it possible to turn a greedy person into a generous person? Does a man's greed depend on the degree of love for you? Let's try to understand these issues.

Is the man greedy or practical?

First you need to understand what is considered greed and what is considered saving. After all, there are different types of men.

Successful and truly rich men in principle, from a female point of view, they are greedy. The truth has long been known that the more money a person has, the greedier he is.

And if a man started his own business not so long ago, he has not yet had time to get enough of money. He sees many prospects for the development of his business, requiring financial investments, and therefore prefers to invest all his money in work and only a little in all other areas of life.

In this case, we cannot yet talk about greed: maybe it is just practicality and the understanding that money must first be invested in something that will later bring income.

Again, think about whether you need to endure all these hardships, not knowing whether you will be able to enjoy dividends in the future - suddenly the man will have another woman. Here we are not talking about your husband, but about the men who come into your life. If your partner does not propose to you and says: “Be patient, dear,” then you need to understand that in this case there is a certain amount of risk. And here only your heart will tell you the right path.

There are men who will deliberately lead you by the nose, not intending to marry and not wanting to spend money on you now. And there are those who want to develop their business and only then offer you something, in which case your expectations and modesty will return to you a hundredfold... although they may not return. Therefore, you must honestly answer the question: are you ready for losses if your investments - youth, time, health - never pay off?

You may also meet other men who have already established themselves, but who do not want to invest in you. It's worth thinking about why? Or such a man, in principle, does not want to spend money on you, because he is not confident or deeply disappointed in women, or he has some kind of economical position in life. How does he prefer to spend and invest money?

Does he not want to invest and spend money AT ALL, or is this happening because his partner is not confident in your sincerity and love?

And you? Are you really dating him without thinking about money? Do you have self-interest? Are his suspicions and fears justified?

In this situation you should be careful. Greedy men very often tell women heartbreaking stories about how they were robbed by their ex, how they did a lot for her, and in the end she left her with nothing.

Girls, of course, there are notorious bitches among women. But... If this is not a swindler, but a partner who lived with him for several years and fell into a love trap, then think about why she has so much anger at this man? Perhaps she was greatly offended and believed that everything rightfully belonged to her. She may have wanted to compensate for some gap and wound after her relationship with him. Women do this to men only if they are very offended by them. There are, of course, other cases, but if a woman is a notorious bitch, then how did she get to your little angel?

Do not rush to feel sorry for a man and, out of a desire not to be like your former passion, prove to him by all means that you do not need money.

If a man of average income “came” to see you, then see for yourself. If he can’t take you to an expensive restaurant, but he has no problem buying a bucket of ice cream and your favorite fruit, then this does not mean greed. His budget is just limited.

What matters in a man is not how much he pays, but that the amount of money he spends on you is meaningful to him.

For some, 200 rubles is money, but for others, even 20,000 will not cause significant damage to their financial situation. Therefore, you, as a wise woman, do not rush to draw conclusions, but watch your chosen one a little, and then you will be able to understand whether he is a greedy man or not.

Money energy is masculine energy

It is also necessary to understand that money is energy, and masculine. In fact, it is not a man, but male energy that is purposeful, aimed at results and achievements, which is expressed in the form of money.

Why did I emphasize the point that it is not a man who strives for a goal, but his energy? Because very often women do not understand that A man does not always have masculine energy, and this needs to be known and taken into account.

All women have a desire for their partner to be successful and have a lot of money. And if this is not so, then it seems like he is not a real man... And the woman begins to feel unhappy.

Although, if such a weak man came into your life, then according to the laws of nature, you most likely have more developed masculine energy, and if you do not realize it, then this also makes you unhappy. And it turns out that you suffer twice and are twice unhappy. You don’t feel like a woman next to the average man and you don’t realize your natural potential.

A man with feminine energy will not be able to kill a mammoth in the forest for you. He will shoot a rabbit and cook it for you himself. With such a partner, you will have to learn to save money, or, having spent everything at once, you will then suck your paw.

But how many other positive aspects do such men have?

• They are truly caring, love children, and enjoy spending time with their family.
• They understand the world of your feelings and experiences.
• You can talk to them like you would a friend, about everything and nothing.
• They are always ready to listen to you and for them family is a priority in their life values.
• Maybe, of course, they are sometimes overwhelmed by emotions and feelings, but mostly they are open-hearted and very warm. It's cozy with them.

It is difficult to call such a man greedy, just because he has no money. But he is generous with his soul and does not skimp in terms of care and emotions. Yes, he won’t be able to invite you to the Bahamas, but he will renovate your room or make something with his own hands.

Greed is a quality that extends beyond finances. If a person is greedy, he is greedy in everything - in money, words, care, love, attention.

There are many men in whom feminine energies predominate and who, by definition, cannot be strong in this world. But because of prevailing stereotypes, all women want successful partners.

Yes, the successful ones will be able to provide you with the comfort you deserve. You will not save or count pennies, but you must understand that such a man will not have time for you, or he will be emotionally closed. You will miss love and warmth, you will begin to yearn for simple human, warm and sincere communication.

A woman is designed in such a way that she will always find a reason to be sad about what she does not have. And happy are those who accept a man for who he is. And they rejoice in what he gives.

A man's failure as a woman's complex

Nowadays, many women develop an inferiority complex due to the fact that their husband/partner is unsuccessful, or they meet only men of this type in their life. Almost all women's trainings say that factors such as a man's success and the amount of money he has depend on the woman.

And the woman attends various courses, persistently carries out ceremonies and rituals - with the sole purpose of making her man successful. And if this does not work out, she takes full responsibility for the failure upon herself. At the same time, she does not understand at all that yes, a woman is responsible for a man, but... provided that he has potential and he himself wants to be successful. And if a man doesn’t have such a desire, then at least do something, he won’t be rich.

When you plant an apple tree, you know exactly what kind of apples this tree will bear. However, living or dating a certain man, for some reason you hope to get a harvest of oranges from the apple tree in the fall. And if there are no oranges, then you blame yourself: “That means I’m like that, some kind of sub-woman.” And your man, despite all your efforts, is not getting rich.

This does not mean that he is not a man. But he just can give you OTHER things... And if you look inside yourself, you will probably find that money will come to you much faster.

You can say: “Why then do you need a man? I won't be able to respect him." But this is your problem.

Remember the movie “Moscow Doesn’t Believe in Tears”? The main character, the director of the factory, met Gosha, who was lower in status than her and earned less, but this did not detract from his masculine qualities in her eyes. She could be a woman at home and a leader at work.

And if you are higher than a man in social status, then this should not become a reason for disrespect for him. You compare successes and achievements when it comes to love.

Although, of course, there are many excesses, for example, when a woman plows for days, and a man has fun on the couch, openly taking advantage of the lady’s love. Such manifestations must be recognized immediately and stopped in time.

The sick greed of a man

You must understand that if by nature a man has more feminine energy, then you should not expect great success from him in society.

However, there are often men who in a perverse way combine both half-man and half-woman. Such partners will not be able to give you either the warmth of feminine energy or male security in material terms, although at the same time they behave like a “model man”, demanding respect and veneration. Run away from these types, and as quickly as possible. Understand that no woman can solve the deep-seated problems of a man, which initially prevent him from realizing himself in any aspect.

This is not a disadvantage or a reason for humiliation - such men need help, deep and serious psychotherapy in order to restore parts of themselves damaged in childhood. But you are not a psychotherapist, you are a woman.

If you don’t get anything from a man, then it means he either DOESN’T WANT to give you anything or CANNOT give you anything.

A man with severe psychological problems not only cannot give you anything, he does not want it. Such men are greedy by nature. And this male greed destroys a woman. Don’t try to understand and justify this, you won’t be able to become an accepting, unconditionally loving mother for a man, or heal the emptiness of his soul.

The wife cannot solve the problems that the husband had in childhood. The union of a man and a woman is not a union of mother and son, where one gives and the other receives. This is a reciprocal relationship where you both give and receive.

Answer yourself honestly the question: what do you get from a man?

• Wife status?
• Material support?
• Feeling safe?
• Support?
• Love and warmth?
• Care?
• Feeling of a reliable rear? What?

If none of the above, then isn’t your man a pathological greedy person?

Well, you won’t be able to make him generous, no matter how hard you try; he will always only consume without giving anything in return.

You will not have complete unconditional acceptance of a man, it is very difficult: you cannot even love your children with only such love. In any case, you have your own desires and requirements. And there is no need to be ashamed or embarrassed about them.

Yes, sometimes a woman, with her claims and dissatisfaction, destroys all a man’s aspirations to do anything for her. In theory, a man always wants to be the best in the eyes of his woman, and I think this is the most important thing - not to kill this desire.

If a man feels that he is the best for you, he tries to be so, and this desire is his potential. Don't destroy it. And how it will be realized - in money, achievements, love for you, care or something else - it doesn’t matter. Learn to appreciate what you have.

If a man doesn't even try to be the best for you, or you systematically killed his desire, then it will not be easy to restore and return everything. Maybe it was not you, but his mother who tried hard and destroyed the desire to please a woman in her son; in this case, no matter what you do, you will not be able to rehabilitate this ability. If the mother did not demand anything at all from her son, surrounded him with love and care, without noticing that she was raising a real narcissist and egoist, then you will not be able to change his existing attitude towards life. So male greed is the lack of desire to please a woman and be the best in her eyes.

Greed is the inability to give, and not only money, but also love, care, warmth, attention, time...

If this ability was destroyed in childhood by a mother or, for example, a father who disrespected his son, made fun of him, laughed at his failures, then as a result the young man gave up forever, considering himself somehow unfinished. And no matter how hard you try, you are unlikely to be able to increase his self-esteem.

You must understand that you should not transfer responsibility for a man’s greed onto yourself, think that it means that you are not a woman, since such a man is next to you. It may not be about you at all.

If you know that a man earns money and saves it for his needs, like a hamster in his hole, then think about it, aren’t you dealing with a real greedy person? Remember, such a partner destroys a woman on a subtle level, because you give, but do not receive anything in return.

I am writing all this about men with whom you have been in a relationship for quite some time.

If you have just started dating, then at first it is difficult to judge the qualities of your partner. Let the relationship develop and watch what happens.

Especially dangerous are men who do not invest money in business and at the same time constantly save on a woman and even on themselves. And they collect, collect... Money is energy, and it must be in motion, in flow, and if this does not happen, then you and such a partner will wither away like stagnant water in a swamp. The more money a man gives, the more he receives, but this does not mean that you need to give every penny, but some of it must be spent. If for a business, then the money invested will pay off handsomely; if for a woman, then by pleasing her, the man sees a happy and satisfied partner, which means he will feel better about it.

Signs of a greedy man

• Have you noticed that a man with great pleasure spends money, but only if he himself gets something from it. He can pay for dinner at an expensive restaurant, but only because he likes to go there. He can buy expensive wine because he loves it. He can even pay for your tour, but he will do it not for you, but for himself. And you will be like an additional application to his pleasure. It is important to understand these points: is a man spending money on himself or on you?
• Greedy does not recognize and does not understand why give gifts if there is no reason for it, he will give flowers exclusively twice a year: on March 8 and on your birthday. He believes that spending on pleasure is useless, you need to invest money wisely.

• When the conversation turns to spending or finances in general, he immediately begins to remember his past achievements, about how he used to have a lot of money, that there were different times, and how wasteful he was with money. That is, he will remember all the moments when he HAD them and when he spent them, but will not mention what to do now to improve his financial situation.

• Wherever you go, he will comment on the cost of this or that thing. and complain about unreasonably high prices. In a restaurant, he will also mention in some form, even jokingly, the cost of the dishes.

• He keeps track of all the discounts, knows where and what is cheaper. He will always buy things only on sales or promotions. Moreover, if he buys something cheaper, he will be immensely proud of himself and be in a good mood.

• He is very reluctant to spend a lot of money. He always has a limit in his head, a ceiling on the amount for purchases, and with further spending his mood will deteriorate, he will begin to get nervous.

• He loves to collect things; collecting is his passion and hobby.

Of course, you need to be able to distinguish when a man is truly greedy and when he is simply rational. If you need a car to conveniently get to work, and you want expensive jewelry, and a man makes a choice in favor of comfort, then this is not greed, but a manifestation of his care for you.

It is very difficult for a man with pronounced masculine energy to spend money on unnecessary things. He prefers to plan his budget and spend money wisely. But It’s hard to call such a man greedy.

But if a partner, in principle, cannot spend money on pleasure, but only pays for useful things, then he is unlikely to give you the emotions and attention that you will most likely need greatly when you are next to him.

Change a greedy man

If you do decide to try this, here are some tips.

• First, you must be ready to accept a man for who he is. Imagine that he will always be greedy. All life. In this case, will you be able to live with him, love and respect him? If not, then don't even waste your time and energy.

• If you can, try to identify tasks for a man from the nearest development zone. Be content with what you have, but dream of a LITTLE BIT more. For complete happiness, you need only a little.

• So, for the sake of this little thing, the man will try to change. But be careful! If your desires are from the category “I want to be a pillar noblewoman,” then in this way you will kill any aspiration in your partner.

• Create a step in your life that will be easy for him to climb. Don’t build insurmountable rocks that he won’t even try to climb.

• With a slight difference in mood, let your man understand what you like and what you don’t.

• Share your emotions generously when receiving gifts. But don’t jump to the ceiling and don’t thank a hundred times for one given rose.

• Tell him about his generosity towards you. It is likely that he will want to become like this.

If you are too demanding of a man, then perhaps you should reconsider your criteria. But if, on the contrary, you forget about your desires, then learn to appreciate and love yourself.

Learn to see a real man, with his abilities and ability to give. Don’t try to make the king of beasts, Leo, out of a kind and loving cat.